My First...
Matt and I prepared for a med-free birth experience with a 12-week Bradley Method course. Once I hit 41 weeks, we were facing the very likely possibility of an induction. I was a little terrified but, despite the intervention, I was still able to get my Bradley birth! I could not have done it without my wonderful, amazing midwife and the support of my husband and all of the hospital nurses.
We trekked off to the hospital (a whole 7-minute drive from our house) on Sunday, September 6, 2009 to get settled in before my induction the following morning. My midwife was at the hospital that night and she stopped by to talk to us a little bit about our plan of action. The main thing I remember was her explaining to us that there was a possibility of meconium being in the amniotic fluid since I was almost two weeks post-term. She would check for it when she broke my water and, if there WAS meconium, then a couple of nurses would be standing by to take the baby to the NICU once he/she was born.
I was 41 weeks and 6 days pregnant when my midwife broke my water at 5:00am on September 7 (Labor Day)! It didn't hurt a bit... no more discomfort than what I experienced when she stripped my membranes... and no meconium! My contractions started up pretty regularly after that and I handled them like a champ all the way to transition, which I think I got to at around 4:00 or 5:00 but I could be totally off, lol. There were times when my midwife suggested I use nipple stimulation to keep my contractions coming. I was surprised at how effective that method was! It really did bring on some pretty immediate and strong contractions. It really helped me to just breathe them out and moan through them (moaning especially later on when I was closer to transition). I kept trying to picture my uterus pulling open my cervix and just visualize the baby coming down further into my pelvis. That was my key to success and I thought I did really well! I think I only had my eyes open for maybe a total of two hours throughout the whole experience. I was completely focused. Swaying and rocking my head from side to side was another way that I coped as I got into transition. I also changed positions quite frequently while in active labor. We walked the halls a little bit (although that didn't last too long), I used the birthing ball and leaned forward onto the bed (that was one my favorites), used the side-lying position on the bed, sat in a glider (my other favorite) and sat in a regular armchair. I also labored on the toilet for a while around the times I was going to the bathroom. I just alternated positions to labor how I felt would be most comfortable at the time. I also took a shower when I was in fairly early labor and that felt nice but after that I just didn't have it in me to get back in the shower when my midwife asked me if I wanted to later on. On another note, I thought that I would get annoyed at being hooked up to the monitors but it was actually kind of nice to see proof of all the work I was doing. It was sort of motivational to keep on going when I could witness those strong contractions on the monitor. I knew they were making good progress!
This was my biggest fear... and looking back, rightfully so! My midwife checked me probably around 6:00pm and I was 9cm with a lip of cervix all the way around. I moved to laboring in a birthing chair by this time, which is like a toilet with the front of the seat cut out (easier access for the birth attendant than what a toilet would provide). She let me labor for a couple more hours to see if I could get to 10cm but my contractions started to lessen in intensity and space out because my uterus was just tired I guess. That lip of my cervix also started to swell from the pressure of the baby trying to come through. She said that our best option was to give me the lowest dose of Pitocin to increase the strength of my contractions so I could make it that last little bit. Once that Pit hit my veins, it was a whole new ball game. I started to lose my mind and I felt like I couldn't control myself anymore. My contractions went from tolerable and spaced out to extremely intense and close together! It was excruciating, I'm not going to lie... and that was only the lowest dose of Pitocin. I was at the point of just wanting to quit and have a c-section just so it could all be over. I really started to doubt myself. I remember sitting there on the verge of tears in terrible pain saying, "No more!" My cervix just didn’t want to make it all the way to 10cm so my midwife ended up having to put her fingers up there to push my lip of cervix out of the way while I was bearing down to get the baby's head past that point. I think that was the most painful part of my entire experience.
I got the baby's head past that lip of cervix while I was still on the birthing chair. I kept pushing as they instructed (I never felt any “urge to push”) and then my midwife told me that my bladder might be full, which wouldn’t allow as much room for the baby to come down. She told me to pee right there since she didn’t want me to have a Pitocin contraction while trying to walk over to the toilet (God love her). She laid down a Chux pad and I really tried to go but it wasn’t happening. I even heard them talking about a catheter which was enough for me to try my best to go! The next best thing was to change positions. I ended up moving to the bed on all fours, which is one of the last positions I expected to push in but it worked for me so I just went with it. There was no way I could have pushed on my back with those Pitocin contractions. My mind was still in a frenzy at this point and I was no longer in control... at least I didn't feel like it. Once I got on the bed on all fours, things really started progressing. I always thought that the pushing stage brought a sense of relief during contractions but that sure wasn't the case for me. I'm guessing the Pitocin might have played a role in that... but it hurt TERRIBLY to push with those contractions. I was definitely not one of those silent, relaxed moms that we saw in the videos during our Bradley class! I was yelling, shrieking, growling, you name it. And that ring of fire... OUCH. I still don't know how I did it. Matt kept saying how dark the hair was when they could see the head (which seemed like forever). I just wanted to get the head out! I wanted to reach down to feel the head crowning but a.) I was on all fours so that wasn't going to happen and b.) it hurt so bad that I don't even think I would have been able to even if I was in a favorable position because it was just so intense. It seemed like I pushed for hours but I only pushed for one hour before Noah Matthew was born at 9:39pm weighing 8lbs. 5oz. and measuring 21in. long!
Matt yelled out that we had a little boy as soon as Noah came out (we didn't know if we were having a boy or girl). I slowly turned around so I could see him and the nurses handed him to me immediately. I absolutely could not believe I just did that and I was holding our son! It was absolutely surreal. My midwife examined me after delivery, which definitely hurt (you think it’s over when the baby is out but nope!). I ended up with a small first degree tear that required one suture... not bad! The massaging of the uterus afterwards also hurt pretty badly. Delivering the placenta actually felt good after that baby though! Matt cut the cord and Noah breastfed pretty well for about 30 minutes after I was all taken care of. He latched on like a pro but then slipped into his deep beauty sleep, as babies do. The lactation consultant was a big help so it was nice to have that resource available. Going to the bathroom afterwards was no big deal. It stung a little but after that ring of fire... I don't think there's anything I can't do!
Like I said earlier, there is no way I could have done this, first and foremost, without my midwife. She was a Godsend and I'm so thankful that she took her personal time out to be with me throughout my entire labor and birth. Words can't even express it. My husband was also a trooper... I'm sure it was difficult for him to see me in such agony but he was a great support, as well! The nursing staff was also amazing and the one particular nurse whose shift covered the time I was pushing was awesome. She and my midwife were both extremely motivational when I wanted to give up. Nobody once mentioned the “e-word”, knowing my wishes for as much of a med-free experience as possible, and afterwards, I was told how cool it was for them to be able to witness a birth without pain medication since they don’t get to see it too often. I would totally give birth in a hospital again but I would never think of using anyone other than a midwife after the awesome experience I had with mine! Those 16-1/2 hours were the most challenging yet most empowering 16-1/2 hours of my entire life.
See the birth story of my second here.
